Wednesday, November 20, 2013

The Heart that almost stopped

My heart raced so fast; I could feel blood at my throat,
I tried swallowing it hard and I was scared if it did make a sound
I curled; I was so tempted.
He was beside me, I could feel his warmth
I wonder why would I want to
Screw it! I don't care
I broke the pen which I clasped so hard 
It did make an incision but it was not as deep as the scar within me
I smiled, I loved that bloody scar
He was startled, but he got used to it somehow
Only he could tolerate the insane me
And I like him for that 
That chocolate man, had a different taste, a different story
I held him so close and pressed my lips against his
Damn! Those feelings bursted.
I did not think twice nor did I hesitate
I wanted his kiss more than anything at that time
I did not let him go and he held me closer
I could feel his strong hands clinging unto my waist
and I bit him gently 
I could feel the hunger and so did he
We smiled; and at that point I knew no regrets

Thursday, December 27, 2012

Dear bloggies,

Probably this would be my last blog for the year & I want to mention certain event (s) occurred to commerate

  • My success in conversion of Gleneagles KL into safety blood collection set
  • My 1st and 2nd earned Polo handbag
  • Amma's trip to the Europe
  • Recognition & award from Smith Medicals
  • Langkawi @ Hangover trip
  • Backstabbers
  • The essence of family ties
  • Taking pride in my bachelorette
  • The value of temporary-ness
  • God's amazing grace that sustaineth me
  • Good books
  • Invented my own dressing sense
  • Bought a tablet PC & laptop
  • Every single effort been snatched away and almost forced to work
I wouldn't just state the either the bad or the good things only, because I believe that for whatever God has blessed me with, its beyond of what I deserve. In these past days, I have learnt a lot of valuable lessons in life and I am glad that these will act like stepping stones towards the turbulences. I know that coming year wouldn't be a bed of roses but I just hope that things would fall right in its place.

I think that's what we all can do. Hope
That's what drives us to our dreams and heals our disappointments. All we need to do is to Hope and to Believe.

I am beginning to look life in a different angle & I am pretty glad for such.

Living life~


Thursday, October 18, 2012


Dear bloggies,

Transformation: a change of sequential order towards adaption for a better result.

I have no idea if the definition above is accepted by all, but I just came up with that definition on how it meant to me.

I experienced such changes, as I compare myself to my current state now. Glad that I have improved and also have neglected some my best people around me. I swear to spend real quality time with them.

I am not here to talk or write about the work style and cycle despite that I could really write a novel about it.
I am here to express my gratitude to time.

Time have been a great remedy and now I am a better me.
Less tears with less fears.
I am able to convince myself that I am doing beyond my limitations and  I strongly believe in it.
I care less about the temporary people and what they have to brag about. I think I am quite resistant with their bulls**t.
I look forward for simple icons yet inspiring, they have so much of things to offer, the values of living your life and cherishing it in an awesome way.
Its not about monetary achievement nor even academic. Its about their perspective of life and how they strive towards living it, considering everyday as a gift and living as if each day has something to offer, adding more "values" to themselves.
Its such a heart warming experience to see how successful they are in their definition, a moment of pride.
I am looking forward for that self satisfactory, not to deny that achievements both financial and academic is not essential, but something is just beyond that we could see.
I am daring myself to dream.



Friday, September 21, 2012

The invisible truth

Dear bloggies,

Its been a long time since I have shouted things over here. I think I have been consumed with the turbulence of stress, pressure, disappointments, achievements and of course fake promises. I tend to be much more aware of the traps set before me, because I am very much familiar with a bunch of hypocritical behavior of some losers out there.
Good news for me!
Sometimes looking back, I hold great pride of what I am now. Stronger and determined. I am so resistant to the typical downfalls a normal young adult as me could face. I could now shrug my shoulders and move on towards what is permanent. I think with great determination and the LOVE of God and loved ones, I could be someone I always wanted to be.
Good news, again!
Call me a stone. Call me a Wonder Woman. Call me a corporate chic. Call me a prejudice. I care less because at the end of the day, I am what I define myself.
I think at the end of the day, its all about who you are and how you want to be. I do not live as according to the standards of a typical person. I hold great respect over myself, I am proud of what I have achieved and sustained so far.
Far be it from me to be hypocritical. I drink. I mingle with group of people with different backgrounds and interest. I have a bunch of great people beside me. I have GOD. I have my confidence and great smile.
I learned how to love myself and to accept myself for good.

I think everyone should love themselves prior chasing for it.

Good day loves!!


Sunday, May 27, 2012

so so slippery!!

I was in paradise!! It has two levels of absolute fun!! The boosts are awesome, the sound system is a WOW factor, the hunks are HAWT!! and bla2. Where else should I head to de-stress rather than being here!!

It was a jaw-dropping experience; and having two of my best buddies tagging along!! We were happenin and rockin!! Since three of us share the same ideology of fun, fun just got upgraded..!! Moreover, since three of us possess anonymous identity; it was "thrilling" to put our surrounding into a big question mark!!

There was so much of laughter, bonds of mutuality (although three of us had different backgrounds; it doesnt matter), great food, awesome dance floor moves and bullying each other!!

Btw, <3 u guys!!
p/s: does getting tipsy and halting halfway in the road and lying prostate near the lobby sounds like fun??
p/s: and the search in the FB goes on!! (if you know what i mean..><)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012


Dear bloggers,

I believe the saying that sounds if you have nothing good to say about anything, you might of all dont say anything. I strongly believe in that statement. I would not want to say anything bad about anything, if I feel that my statement or point of view does not matter to make a change.

I believe some of you guys are aware of the racism issue provoked by an Indian (sadly) in one of the most famous social network. I would not want to get into the details about it, but what I strongly believe that if you have any sensitive issues to talk about, keep it among those that you know instead of publishing it.

Moreover, I strongly believe that (I dont want to make any change, its an expression of thoughts) to talk about race/religion/culture is a very sensitive matter, we are nurtured to live under the same roof since small, we share the same identity although we are diverse. It is a very prestigious claim to say that although we are diverse we are united!!

Be proud of what you are and respect others!! Its not difficult, lets cling our hands together to celebrate each other. Learn to accept and adapt!! Let your minds grow, break your cocoon!!

Just because of a number of minute type of people dont persecute the entire community!! Cultivate on maturity and civilization, rather than claiming to be one!! Spread Love!!


Monday, May 21, 2012

Let silence speak

people say that a picture says a thousand words...but i wanna shout that a silent mind "speaks" a thousand words too!!

since pressure is bombarding me nowadays, especially at work, considering if i really could carry it, and on the contrary not wanting to run from my problems, i would just wanna keep quiet.
i think that is very much wise and safe to do...for now; at least
never will i run away from it, because when i wanna turn around, i wanna see my accomplishments and how to break the daylight of all the hurdles i had, rather than seeing how i escaped and no achieving any. This reminds me of a saying that a rolling pebble will never get moss!
i will cling!! let is slap me hard, because i noe there is a brightness at the end of the tunnel, it is just a phase of life, i must go through it, i can do it of course with constant prayer and self motivation. let others sneer at me, let them climb over me, but i will sustain on HIS word.
i can always unwind me in my own way, thank music,caffeine, alcohol & love!!
all that i need to do now is be silent and let my actions speak!!